I want a photoshop where on earth I can airbrush stuff & do touch ups & teeth whitening & fix absolute things etc etc etc etc.. If you know of any that aren't adobe than pls schedule them here : )
Answers: I recommend GIMP, it have various features of Photoshop and costs nought.
GIMP is the GNU Image Manipulation Program. It is a freely distributed piece of software for such tasks as photo retouching, figure composition and doll authoring.
Other free alternatives would be Paint.web or Picasa from Google.
You can try Gimp. It hasn't adjectives the features of Photoshop, but it is free and may suit your wants.
http://www.gimp.org/
Google for: photo editing software free
There's lots, try a few.
Paint.network and Photofiltre 6 come to mind for starters.